On Insanity and Raising Children

A definition of insanity we often hear is that it is "doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results." Now I'm not going to discredit the value of this statement. There are many times throughout life when it is not only beneficial but necessary to take a step back and figure out hat it is we keep trying to do that just isn't making a difference. That being said, what I'd like to focus on is those times when repetition (even when that repetition isn't yielding some visible change) is actually exactly what we need to be doing. The best example of this I can think of is with raising children.

Any of you who have children or have raised them in the past are doubtless familiar with the concept of saying or doing something over and over...and over and over. (this could go on forever) Quite often the only apparent result of all this repetition is feeling very much like this common quote on insanity now applies to you. Do not despair! Not only are you actually still as sane as you ever were, it's likely that what you are actually accomplishing is good parenting. How, you ask? Well, for starters just think of some of the most difficult life lessons you have learned. Were they things that just clicked the first time you ever were introduced to the concept? If so I should probably be the one listening to what you have to say about life. If, however, you are just like the rest of us there have been several life lessons that took a lot of repetition (whether through words or negative consequences) before it sunk in.

The other major concept that comes to mind when thinking of the unapparent sanity in repetitive child rearing is that of consistency. Another very common saying we hear is "change is the only constant" or some variation of that same idea. Think for a moment of how sad that outlook on life really is. Is there really absolutely nothing that can be relied upon to stay the same? No truth we can always believe? Now think further about how sad it would be to create that world for your children. They're still new to the world. It's a big, scary and confusing place.

So the next time you are telling your child for the 4,563rd time to act a certain way...instead of thinking yourself as a crazy person repeating some futile action...realize that you are creating some small amount of stability and consistency in an otherwise unstable and inconsistent world. You are the anchor...and an anchor always needs to do the same thing in the same way. Hold fast and don't despair. It's having far more of an impact than you may ever know.

Where your treasure is

I find it interesting what kind of things and people our society places the greatest importance on. Think about it. Who is the most famous person you can think of that's alive today?

[pause for thought]

Now tell me...or rather think to yourself...why is that person famous? Was it Stephen Hawking, one of the greatest minds in astrophysics? Or maybe you thought of a really famous contemporary artist...or philosopher...religious leader maybe? Oh, or maybe a famous doctor! That would be good, right? On that note, who IS the most famous doctor in the world right now? Seems like a good question. I often take questions like these to google. It's kind of the place to find things these days, right? So let's see...Well, there's Dr. Spock. I can respect that. I don't think he was (or will be?) a physician per se, but he did have a good grasp on logic. Then there's Dr. House. He's definitely famous. Oh, Dr. Seuss! I remember that guy. (don't we all?) Or how about Dr. Pepper? Everyone loves that guy. (wait, is it a guy?) Let's not forget Dr. Who. Wouldn't want a horde of angry nerds after me for neglecting to mention that one.

Starting to see a pattern? The only one I could find that was an actual physician...Dr. Kevorkian. For those who may not recall, he's the famous promoter of euthanasia. Don't worry, I'm not turning this post into a diatribe on the ethics of mercy killing. That's another discussion for another time. I think we can all agree, however, that what makes any of these "doctors" famous actually has nothing to do with skill as a physician.

Now as an interesting part of this little experiment, think of the most famous person you can think of that has ever lived. I'm willing to bet that one isn't an actor or fictional character from a TV series. That's a little more comforting. Still, I have to wonder...When are we ever going to learn? Most historical figures that we respect and even revere for their contributions to humanity not only lacked support during their lifetime, but were often reviled and persecuted for their ideas.

Now here we are in a time where we feel so enlightened and evolved. Yet, the people we place on a pedestal and give our hard-earned wages to support aren't the great thinkers and those striving every day to make our world a better one. It's not the Nobel Prize winners that our kids wish they could grow up to be like. It's not the doctors working to cure cancer whose names are heard echoing through the hearts and minds of 'We, the people...'

So that leads me to the quote of the day that's on my mind and the one responsible for the title of this post:

Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.

Maybe we can strive to place our treasure a little less in the silver (interesting coincidence?) screen and a little more in the amazing individuals that constantly provide a more amazing existence for all of us.

The Beginning

No doubt the first question any victims of my blog will ask is where the name came from. Well, I owe that thought to Victor Hugo. For those who may not know who he is or have heard his name, but aren't sure why...look him up. That what I did. Anyway, the quote in particular I'm referring to is:


A man is not idle because he is absorbed in thought. There is a visible labor and there is an invisible labor.

I like that. It makes me feel just a little less lazy. After all, the Cartesian Coordinate system came from someone laying in bed watching a fly, right? (yes, it did)


So, I wouldn't presume to believe I could add any significance to one of the greatest literary achievements since the bible, but for my own purposes, I'd like to add my own little line.

All that glitters is not gold.

Not all who wander are lost...

And not all who remain still are inactive.